The clock was about to strike 12. It was a silent, cold
night. She was home alone. With her heavy head she looked herself in the mirror
with her swollen eyes and messed hair. Knowing that she could hold on tight
until her temptation was to fall for a long time and leave a dreadful scar
behind, her sadness embed her fragile heart. She locks herself. Opens her
drawer and takes out a scissor. She slid her wrist. Her entire world stood
still as she felt numb. She lied in a corner resisting the inevitable pain. She
screamed so loud until her scratchy throat made her breathing difficult. She
was on the floor for hours crying and sobbing restlessly drinking a bottle of
vodka. She sliced open her artery. She didn’t want to live. She searched for a single
reason why she wanted to live, but she didn’t deserve to. She was disgusted on
herself and wanted to end it all. She felt no pain. She calmed herself down, as
her sleeping pill made her dizzy and put her to bed on the floor. She was out
for 20 hours. There was blood and puke everywhere when she got into sense. Her wrist
was drenched with dry blood. Knowing that it was another bad day she sobers herself
and cleans before taking a puff.
At the end of the day, after your busy schedule, you probably return home exhausted. Maybe it is because you are so much occupied with the assignments and project works that you hardly any have time to think about things you love. Or, it may also be because of something that you missing in your life, which are yet to discover. If I am wrong, then it must be the explosion of thoughts and feelings that left you numb. It’s just not tolerable to you. Yet, you’re still holding onto it as long as you can. Well, if it is killing you every day you must let it go. Life is already complicated; it is advisable that you don’t further complicate it by listening to your heart. You must be thinking that it is risky and question yourself with “what ifs”. After all, you have the right to govern your life the way you want to. Your life is stirred by your will. It’s been quite a while since you started chasing the reality. You found out numerous missing ingredients along the way which finally...

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